My TCK Story

I only learned the term “Third Culture Kid” in my forties, and realised that it described me and my children. It was such a revelation!

At the age of seven, I returned to Singapore after nearly 3 years living in the UK where my parents were pursuing graduate studies. It was a fairly rough return as I was placed in a Chinese-medium school so that I could learn Chinese (I hardly spoke any at the time). Unfortunately, not speaking Chinese meant that I didn’t make any friends. Schoolwork was also entirely in Chinese and I found it a struggle even though I did have help from my grandmother at home. And the school culture and expected behaviour was so different from what I had been used to. Thankfully, after a year, my parents transferred me to an English-medium school, and things improved greatly after that.

My children were born overseas, so their first transition was back to Singapore though they were too young (2.5 years and 2 months) to feel any impact. Over the next 14 years, we relocated several times, so they had to make friends in different environments, and experienced a variety of schooling options. They were 14 and 16 years old when we finally brought them back to Singapore to reintegrate into Singapore society and also complete their education.

When my children became TCKs, memories of my own return to Singapore spurred me and my husband to do find ways to ease their transitions. We knew that preparation for return needed to begin well in advance. What we did must have helped as both children settled well in Singapore schools, and are now living and working in Singapore.

Since returning to Singapore in 2013, I’ve heard accounts from families with Singaporean TCKs who returned to the uniquely Singaporean education system and National Service. Some coped well with the transition, but many encountered difficulties that I think could have been avoided or mitigated. Last year, I wrote Rooted, Resilient & Ready: Preparing Singaporean Third Culture Kids for Home to help families who are navigating these transitions.

* A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is someone who has spent a significant part of their childhood living outside their passport country.